First and foremost I do not want to portray myself as a Cuba expert, these are only my opinions and impressions of this amazing country. Cuba is easily the most complicated place I have ever been. For an American tourist there are many factors and several layers of Cuban culture which are a mystery, and for me very difficult to understand. I recently had the pleasure of spending several days in Havana with Dooshbag and DonGringo. This was my second trip to Cuba, on my first trip I was only there for a few days. This trip I was in Havana for the better part of a week. On my first trip I had moderate success and was ready to watch and learn from my new friends. As I am sure many of you are aware Dooshbag is a resident Cuba expert on a few boards and I couldn't believe my luck that we were to be there at the same time. I arrived at my hotel late in the afternoon and after checking in as I was going to my room the bell boy and two security guards joined me in the elevator. Initially I was thinking I was in trouble, but immediately they said don't worry we know what you want, OK. I was informed that having girl in my room wouldn't be a problem for a gift of $10, which in reality turned out to be $15. Getting bumped $5-$10 here and there turned out to be a pattern I encountered many times and at different places. That is one thing you have to deal with in Cuba, everyone is on the take and virtually everybody will be working short term cons on you. Even when I wasn't obviously aware of it I was still sure I was being watched constantly for any sign of weakness. I know it sounds like I'm paranoid, but this is a reality for tourists in Cuba. This can get to be a real problem for a nice guy (read sucker) like myself, that doesn't normally sweat $10 here or $20 there.
After unpacking and checking in with Dooshbag and Dongringo, we made plans to go to Casa de la Musica in Centro Havana. I was waiting in the lobby for my ride when I spotted a blonde beauty queen, I must have been drooling, because the bell boy says "you want her"? I say "sure, but not now, at 10 o'clock tonight" I go out with the guys, meet several people including TravelAl and head back to the hotel @ 10:30. When I get to the hotel I am told the chica was there and will return after eating. After an hour no chica and I am bummed, because I really wanted to fuck this chick. This was a pattern for the week, I would be late and the chicas didn't wait. I am not sure what I was doing wrong, Dongringo and Dooshbag had to screen their calls to avoid the chicas that were chasing them. The bell boy tells me no problem he will find another girl and I said OK. I was pissed because I missed out on hanging with Doosh & DG more and Doosh had made several offers to hook me up with hotties that I passed on. The guard calls about 15 minutes later and says he has some chicas for me to look at, being bummed I look quickly and pick one that has a pretty face. The bell boy tells me no more than $40 and I say OK. When I get to the room she wants $100 for one hour I tell her no way. The evening was cold and rainey and she had several layers of clothes which she is peeling off and I am starting to notice this girl is nothing short of amazing. After several minutes of negotiation she sticks on $80 for 2-3 hours, I try to call her bluff but she is calling security to leave. It is now almost midnight so I fold and say Ok. I ask if I can take her picture and she obliges, as I am looking at her I keep thinking, man this girl looks familiar. When we get around to sex, she is very willing to please, including BBBJ and any position desired, but even though all the appropriate groans and moans are made it is obvious she is doing her job. Upon reviewing the photos I realize that she was none other than the famous Adriana, which DG later confirmed. After about an 1 1/2 hours there is a knock on my door and a security guard is there saying there is a problem with the police and the girl has to leave. It doesn't hit me till later that this is an agreement between the guard and the girl before she ever came to the room. Did I mention that everyone here are always working little scams and cons?
The next day Doosh & DG tell me I have to see this casa in Miramar, this place is too cool, swimming pool, efficiency apts. that look like they were done by a decorator, VCR & stocked bar. They are $100 a day, but after the experience I had at the hotel I am in, and DG moves over there also. That night several of us head to El Ajibe for some great food, I am suppose to have a date with a friend of a friend of Doosh but she doesn't show. It is really no problem though because I spot this girl at the restaurant that is fairly cute and has a very good personality, so we head back to the casa and as soon as we get in the door she is striping and kissing me passionately. I think great, she hasn't even mentioned money at all. We are on the bed and she has my dick in her mouth and she looks at me and asks " how much money ju give me"? "what"? "how much money ju give me"? "I don't know, maybe $30 or $40". "no I need wan hunred feefty dollars" "are you fucking crazy"? " I need wan hunred feety dollars" "get out, hit the fucking road" "OK we talk about money later OK"? "OK" She than proceeds to fuck me fairly well. when we are through I want to get rid of her so I give $40 bucks and say bye.
This chick goes ballistic and wants more money, says she needs cab fare, so I give her $5 more, she is now crying and screaming that she wants more money. This goes on for about 20-30 minutes, till I can't stand it anymore and give another $20. As she is leaving she says "Sman, kees me" "what"? " Sman, I wan you kees me" "no way" "Sman, ju come ear and ju kees me" "are you fucking crazy"? "Sman, I wan ju kees me" " OK fine if you will leave then". After I kiss her she looks at me and asks "Sman, what time ju wan me ear tomorrow"? " out out out" I could hear her standing outside waiting for a cab and sobbing. The security guard looked at me like what the fuck? I need to get out for a while so I leave DG a note and head back to the hotel to watch TV and end up sleeping there. I head back to the casa in the afternoon and we hook up with Doosh and start cruising Miramar looking for girls. We find one I really like, but she wants $80 and Doosh says loose her or you will have another bad experience. We see another girl who is obviously a pro and when we are turning I see a girl on a side street that appears to be an amateur. She is young and very cute, I am in love, her name is Maite. We pick her and a friend up and go to get some lunch, at lunch out come the cell phones (a bad sign for a young girl in Cuba) they order cigarettes and expensive imported beer for lunch. She say she wants $70, Doosh says "cut her loose" but I am already sprouting wood just looking at this chick, and say "no man, I want to fuck this girl" he already knows I am going to get jerked around.
At the casa, the girl confirms that I will pay $70 and I ask her for how long and she indicates as long as I want. The girl is very cute, she has small breasts, but is curvy in all the right places. She looks so good naked I go down on her, which seems to get her worked up fast, she speaks no english, but looks at me and says "condom" I tell her I am enjoying what we are doing. She grabs my hand and pulls it up to her pussy, which I interpret that she wants some type of penetration, good guess. I insert two fingers and work her clit with my tongue, she starts doing that salsa thing with her hips that those Cuban chicas do. I work my fingers in real deep, up behind her cervix, she gets really wet and moans a little bit and lets out a great big grunt. She then reaches for a condom and starts doing me cowgirl, she is small enough so she places her feet on either side of my hips ahd squats over me, with her pelvis and hips doing that salsa thing. This might be the girls job, but I think she really enjoys her work. She is laying around naked listening to music and playing with my computer, seeming generally content. I ask her if she wants to go out for dinner with us this evening and I can see the wheels start turning. I ask a Cuban friend to come in and interpret for me so I can pin her down. She says she wants to go home, shower and change clothes, we take her home and tell her we will pick her up at 7:00. When we get there she is with friends and tells the Cuban guy she is not ready and needs to shower yet, she then motions me alone off to the side and I hear the word pagar (to pay, for the non spanish speaking) and split.
I am getting a little tired of paying twice the going rate for one pop, while Doosh and DG have to screen their calls to avoid the chicks that want to fuck them for free, no shit. Maybe it is time to take a break and do some tourist stuff, so I tell the guys I am splitting off on my own for the tourist thing, Doosh thinks I am a lost cause at this point anyway. I check out some beaches nearby and take some cubans that I met last time out for dinner. They always want to go to the same place even though I offer to take them to a nicer place. Their reaction and body language would lead me to believe that they are getting a kickback, which I didn't really have a problem with. That night at the hotel security asks me if I want a chica, sure why not I took a break all day. We go through the usual routine, they have a lineup for me and I pick one. This night there is a really pretty, tall, brunette, with long hair lurking in the back and I say "ella". She wasn't as good a negotiator as the other girls, but held out for $50, so I am sure they have to pay security also. As soon as she got to my room I noticed she was very nervous, actually trembling. I ask her if she has ever done this before and she tells me it is her first time with a tourist, boing, instant wood. No surprise, the sex was less than stellar and I felt kind of shitty after, so I gave her a whole armful of gifts trying to make myself feel better. It occurred to me later that all I probably accomplished was to convince her that this was a good gig.
In the morning I remember DG is going home and call him to say bye, he tells me he is staying for another day, so we plan to catch up later. I do some more tourist stuff that day and get back to my hotel at 5:00 DG is there when I return, he wants to go check out some little park Dooshbag told him of that sometimes has girls new to town, as it is near the bus station. We don't see much there and stop for a snack at a sidewalk cafe I start visiting with a pretty but plainly dessed girl and ask her if she would like to go out to eat with me this evening and she acccepts, we plan to meet at 7;00. I like it that her clothes are plain and she looks like she doesn't have much money. Most of the other girls have been a little to mercenary and think this will be a nice change. We meet that evening and go out for dinner, I bring a Cuban guide along as a driver and interpreter. This girl was very shy and extremely worried about getting arrested. She won't go to my hotel out of fear and wants me to go to her place, after visiting with my guide he is doubtful I will like her place(too poor), she says she knows a nice casa near my hotel we can use for $20 bucks and I agree to that. We arrive at the casa at 10:30 and I tell the driver to give me 3 hours, he is going to go see one of his girlfriends, this guy turns out to be a major horn dog himself, he has novias all over town. My guide said he visited with the girl and she is lined up for $30 and she doesn't mention money at all to me. We have sex and this girl is very shy and inhibited, the sex is really no fun at all. I also didn't like going to someone's house and having them leave for a few hours while we fucked in their bed. After we fuck she uses my laptop to write two paragraphs about how ashamed she was to be doing this and it was only because she needed the money, oh yea, and she wanted to know if she could have $40 instead of $30. I gave her $40 and was losing interest in her because of the bad sex, so I told her I wanted to go and she waived down a taxi for me and I went back to the hotel. I got back to the hotel at 12:30 and a few minutes later my guide showed up and wanted to know what happened. We were laughing about the evening and I was checking my e-mail when a security guard said there was a lady outside that wanted to send an e-mail and he wanted to know if I could help her. I showed her how to do it and bought her a soda and went to another computer to finish my e-mails. when I returned my guide had been visiting with her and she had told him she thought I was a nice man and would like to know me better. I looked her over, she was mid twenties and moderately attractive. I said sure ask her if she wants to come to my room and watch TV and have a drink, she accepted. When we got to my room she was very impressed by how many stations the TV had. We visited using my translator and she started asking if I stayed only at the hotel or if I had a casa also, I lied and told her I had only been at the hotel. She wanted to know how many girls I had been with and things like that. I leaned over and tried to kiss her and she pulled back. I told her that I thought there had been a mistake, that she was looking for a friend or a boyfriend and I thought she had come to my room to have sex for money. We talked a bit more and I was getting tired, so I told her there was no problem we didn't have to have sex and I would give her a few dollars for a cab. She must have liked that because she moved over closer and we watched TV for a few minutes and this time when I kissed her I was met with a warm wet kiss in return. This was definitely GF sex, she would guide my hands and mouth to where she wanted for maximum pleasure. I could feel the heat from her pussy through her jeans and she was so wet it was coming through her jeans, I have only experienced that 2 times, that a girl ctually soaked through her jeans just from ouching. When I pulled off her jeans and panties I couldn't believe my eyes, she had the biggest bush I have ever seen it went from half way to her navel to the top of her thighs. She was a great fuck though, she wanted to get off just as much as I did. She gave me her address and made me promise I would come to her house the next ay. I never made it though, just couldn't get by that bush.
There was a girl that I met last time in Cuba, her name was Adyana and I had tried to find her the whole time I'd been there this time, to no avail. I remembered her as very sweet and innocent, by far not the best looking girl I'd been with there, but it was like having sex with your high school girlfriend. On my last day I was walking downtown and saw her, boy do things change fast in cuba, she was with a chulo and had gold chains everywhere, and was wearing expensive clothes. She remembered me and said she would go back to my hotel. The last time she told me she liked Tommy Girl perfume so I had brought her some, she seemed pleased. We visited for a while and then she brought up money, $40 for 30 minutes, I told her to take her gift and leave and that I knew what she was doing and I didn't like it. She asked me what I wanted to do, I reminded her that last time we had spent the entire evening together for $40. I also pointed out that I had thought of her for months and remembered what type of perfume she liked and brought it for her. I could see her face soften and she told me I was right and apologized she then started to kiss me very warmly. Sex with her was just like I had remembered, deep prolonged eye contact, passionate kissing, and her pussy is so tight and moist. This was in the late afternoon and she said she had to go do a few things, and I wanted to lookup Dooshbag on my last night there, so we made plans to meet at 10:00. I found Dooshbag and went to a cafe with him and some other people, by the time we picked everyone up and got to the cafe it was close to 10:00. I told them I was going to pick up the girl and catch up later. I left for my hotel just a few blocks away, and missed my turn and got into a series of one way streets all the same way, by the time I got out of that I was lost and didn't get back to the hotel till 10:30 or later. The door man said that some girl had been there looking for me, so I waited and waited, no Adyana, I am sure she thought I just fucked her that afternoon then blew her off.
It was midnight, I was leaving in the morning and I was tired, so I decided not to go back out. I couldn't leave the street though, I couldn't stop watching the freak show that is old Havana at night. A young Cuban guy and a cute black chica came up to me and said "you know the girl you were with last night?" I said "yea Aydina" and he told me the cops had her and to follow him. He kept telling me "this is one fucking crazy country man" and the chica would chime in "that's no shit it is fucking crazy man" I thought about it for a minute and out of curiosity had to see where this was going.
I knew it was about money, but this was more complicated than anything I had encountered and wanted to see how they planned on pulling it off. So I followed them and they started to tell me if I didn't pay her fine of $30 she would go to prison, they led me to a dark street and I was ready to turn back when I spotted some cops at the end of the street. They told me "there they are, give me the money", and I said "let's walk down and talk to them" to which they responded "are you fucking crazy you will make it worse". I went ahead and walked over to the police and those two took off like a bat out of hell. I thought they were gone, but they were waiting for me on the way back, in the meantime it had occurred to me that the girls name was Udira, I asked what was the girls name I was with and he said "Dina", I said "wrong name motherfucker", that seemed to present him with an objection he couldn't overcome, so they just walked away. I finally called it a night, even though I had several offers on the way back to the hotel, and packed.
Even though I encountered many complications, I don't want to give the impression that I didn't have fun, I had a total blast and can't wait to go back. In reality I had sex with several beautiful women, spent considerably less than I have in other destinations, and got to hang out with a couple of my heroes. I know much of this report wasn't directly about mongering, but thought it was important for guys to know about. There is so much going on in Cuba, from free girlfriend sex, to cons and scams. If you are comfortable with traditional pay for sex places like México, you might be a little taken back by the way it works here, but if you are up for adventure, there is a lot of potential in Cuba. If I were to give one piece of advice it would be to learn Spanish, I only speak basic caveman Spanish and without help from Dooshbag and others I wouldn't even have got as far as I did. I am not saying it is impossible to do well without speaking Spanish, DonGringo did great and he hasn't even figured out the difference between hablo and habla yet, but he was an exception, I think. In closing I just want to say if you think you would like to go to Cuba, I would urge you to go ASAP before the embargo is lifted, things are going to change very fast after that. A perfect example of the way things are in Cuba now was summed up by a statement made by my Cuban guide, When I questioned him as to whether a girl was a pro or an amateur he said, " well she wants the money, but she wants to fuck too".
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